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After holding out for so long, it’s all over for me now.
I have become a TikTok convert.
Scrolling the app has replaced my long-standing, extremely healthy nighttime routine of watching Law and Order: SVU reruns until I fall asleep.
What I like is how quickly the app has gotten to know me. The algorithm, in its infinite wisdom, serves me the content I didn’t even know I wanted to see as I drift off each night.
Surprisingly, it’s not “ripped from the headlines” sex crimes.
Instead, my feed is filled with the interests from my daily life. Parents sharing how they’ve dealt with a kid who’s started driving (my oldest just got her learner’s permit…eek!), vacation planning tipsand lots on relationships. The good, the bad, the extremely weird.
My favorite thing to do on TikTok is deep dive on a trend.
The latest to enter my feed? A recurring relationship-focused bit. In it, a conversation appears on screen with a third party remarking, “Wow, your husband is such an involved parent!” and the response is, “Yeah, I didn’t marry a [f*cking] loser.”
@abbiepowell1 I am revitalised 🤪
What I like about the “I didn’t marry a loser” trend:
It normalizes expecting more than the bare minimum from your partner.
Presumably, the person doling out the compliment expects enthusiastic agreement, right? “Yes, isn’t he wonderful for taking the kids to school?”
Of course it’s okay to want your partner to hype you up. And she will, if you go above and beyond the mundane tasks (tasks that she presumably tackles, too).
@malorisallee My biggest flex in life #motherhood #Momsoftiktok #fyp #foryoupage #fatherhood #sahm #sahmlife #firstimemom #babyboy ♬ original sound – Annabel
The bullying!
Bullying is bad when it’s about things out of the recipient’s control. Their weight, or skin complexion.
But bullying bad behavior? I’m all in. I say, bring back public shaming for bad behavior in 2025!
@tayloroversharing and that’s on marrying your best friend ✊🏼 | @VAL 🌼 #marriage #bff #husbandcheck ♬ Father Figure (Featured in ‘Babygirl’) – George Michael
Slang I understand.
Most of the women participating in this trend that I have seen are younger than me, with younger kids. They could easily use a term I have never heard of, one I would never attempt to use myself, or even know how to pronounce out loud.
But loser? Loser I know.
Ultimately, I like how this trend provides a benchmark for men.
Granted, I know very well that me and my husband’s algorithms serve up completely different content. He gets golf swing tips and protein intake advice. I get weighted vest workouts and…okay, I actually get protein intake advice too (who know it was so important! Not us, apparently).
So there’s a chance he’ll never see one of these videos organically. But you’re here on Style Girlfriend, so presumably, the same algorithm gods serving me up Disney tips knows you’re interested in the female perspective on all things men’s lifestyle.
Meaning, if you’re lucky, you could be exposed to this valuable insider intel on how not to be a loser.