This is So Chic, Very ChicPAPER’s examination of Bravo’s sprawling cohort of vogue obsessives. From high fashion to TJ Maxx, they’ve actually worn all of it. We’ve simply acquired two questions. Is it so stylish? Is it very stylish?
Rather than wax on with a non sequitur I tie again to Angie Katsanevas’ penchant for a daring purple lip, let’s speak about vogue. Because after this season of The Real Housewives of Salt Lake Citythere is not a lot left for me to say however opinions on vogue.
It’s been a slog of a season within the again half, after the best of highs early on. Sparks flew at Amy the Utah Socialites McMansion and, judging by the efficiency these ladies put on for her visitors, I figured those self same sparks would roar into flame. Instead, they merely lit a tire hearth. It was lovely at first, after the psychic made Lisa Barlow cry whereas Angie performed along with her daughter’s toy horses. But the poisonous fumes quickly choked out all life left in me and on the present, melting down over the next twelve episodes right into a puddle of sludge within the form of Greece and likewise Heather Gay’s discarded mattress.
So, let’s simply speak in regards to the vogue, will we? The medical doctors stated I should not use my mind to arduous after inhaling the fumes.
The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City
Gorgeous, attractive women! It will shock no one to listen to me say that Angie was amongst one of the best dressed this reunion — though, for the longer term, I’d recommend she steer clear of the colour purple. If you already know, you already know! Besides her, Lisa seems to be completely serviceable, as she typically does. Heather is dressed like Jean Smart in season one of Hacks in a sequence that illustrates her want for a vogue reinvention. Meredith seems to be like a girl who’d fairly be wherever else however the profit for most cancers hosted by her dishonest husband’s enterprise conglomerate. Mary is appropriately dressed like a girl who runs a church everybody describes as a cult and Whitney is simply completely happy to be included.
Oh, and Bronwyn? We’ll get to Bronwyn later.
Mary Cosby and Whitney Rose
As a end result of their frequent clashes early within the present’s historical past, Mary and Whitney work fairly nicely as foils to the opposite. Here is the prim church lady, harried by familial trauma and a tempestuous residence life, clawing on the wallpaper of the attic room she’s trapped herself in. In lieu of true social mobility, she clothes herself like a kids’s psychological picture of a wealthy and highly effective lady in a storybook.
Conversely, Whitney, let unfastened of the shackles of spiritual management, runs headlong into the tanning sales space, adorning herself not within the jewels and silks of Mary’s closet however as an alternative with tight and stretchy materials of all kind, girlish and sexual suddenly. Like Barbie’s child sister in a bandage costume. The demons of sexual and social repression nonetheless hang-out her, like Mary, however they’re channeled into a complete lack of inhibition, fairly than a whole environment of barely maintained management.
On the topic of these outfits — nicely, I simply described them, did not I? The sheer gloves and tennis bracelets say extra for themselves than I presumably might.
Meredith Marks
Lisa Barlow
I want Lisa would present us her boobs extra, as a result of look what good boobs they’re! I’m much less on this fairly banal costume, which is about as “OK” a costume can presumably hope to be on this world. At least she walked herself to the L’oréal Féria aisle at CVS and picked up some new field dye earlier than the reunion. I solely need to see my Lisa overly tan and freshly dyed. Give me jet black hair to the ass, or give me nothing!
Angie Katsanevas
I want Angie to step away from purple, as a result of it seems to be so good on her and is concurrently such a loaded colour! would have a lot fairly this been pink, or blue, colours that look equally lovely on her. There’s even a purple selection of this Maria Lucia Hohan costume that will have been completely beautiful on the sofa, and been a pleasant dig at Lisa’s purple costume and their mutual codependency.
Regardless, the lady seems to be attractive. I particularly like how she let her hair down, for a change, after final reunion’s equally good updo.
Bronwyn Newport
Now Bronwyn. I do know you’ve gotten all the cash on the planet, and you’ve got particularly sufficient cash to pay somebody to paint match lipstick correctly when on tv! She is a shocking lady held again by her glam workforce, who insist on these heavy eyeliner seems to be and too-bright blushes. Likewise, I miss the lengthy hair! It’s like she took all of the fallacious notes from the column this season. We needed a softer palette, not a nude one! We needed brighter eyes, no more black liner! We needed a fuckass bob, not extensions!
Regardless, it is arduous to criticize this costume, which is just beautiful within the vast photographs. First seat! A promising place that carries a heavy burden — simply look to your left at Angie!
Heather Gay
Here comes the bride… sorry, it appears I blended the order of issues up. The bride is to her left, this right here is the mom of the bride! It’s an equally noble career with a slight ignoble wardrobe. For a girl who’s eager to show how younger she feels — and is, to be clear — Heather selected a fairly matronly search for such a giant stage. What offers? It’s like that point Lana Del Rey wore a Dillards costume to the Grammys.
Britani Bateman
Britani tried her hardest. She typically does! I need to give it up for Britani, each as a girl on this world and a girl on this present. She gave it her all, and although she fell flat on her face time and time once more, she acquired again up and stored falling. Where did that path of tumbles land her? A residency at 54 Below, thanks very a lot! I used to be within the viewers at her first run of exhibits, and guess who I noticed within the crowd? Audra McDonald, who very a lot gave the impression to be having fun with herself. Kudos, Brit!
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